It was just about closing time and I went outside with my buddy for a cigarette. We saw two mexican guys between cars one over the other holding him down. There was blood everywhere and it seemed the guy just got done beating the shit out of the other. I said hey fucker back off he’s had enough. The guy on top said he was helping him cause he was trying to commit suicide. With that he lets the guy up and I see that his throat has about a 3 inch gash in it and shit is hanging out of it. By this time people had called 911 and they were on their way. The guy with his throat cut walked down the block and around the corner. We figured the excitement was over. Just then we see him run out in the middle of the street and throw his body in front of on coming traffic. A truck screeched to a halt and swerved around him. We ran out and grabbed the guy as he throwing himself on cars screaming HELP me HELP me…we dragged him to the sidewalk and someone put their shirt over his neck to stop the bleeding. Finally the cops showed up and the ambulance. He was fixed up and then deported back to the homeland. It was an interesting Tuesday night.
Shortish version since I’m on my phone. Customer orders a bunch of drinks, and when I tell him the price he just says “fuck you! ” and walks off. I was to busy to really do anything about it but our promoter was right there when it happened. This was his party, mostly his people so he asks if I want the guy kicked out. I say sure, and the promoter goes after the guy. Btw our promoter was roughly 6’5″ 350 pounds. So he removes the guy and brings him outside, basically to where our entrance /line is. So asshole customer wants to talk to a manager (my best friend and roommate) and says that I instigated the problem. My manager basically calls the asshole a lier, well this guy gets pissed and makes a move toward him. Our huge promoter is right there and swoops the guy up by his throat and slams him on the hood of a car (think Undertaker), and squeezes for just a bit. When he lets the guy go, the guy starts yelling about how he’s going to be back with his friends to Fuck us all up. Fast forward an hour and he returns with a few buddies. He goes straight for our head of security, a huge Tungan man, calling him a beaner. At this particular moment our head security had a group of his nephews (all massive Polynesians) hanging next to him about to enter the club. They immediately intervene and offer the asshole and his buddies a 10 second head start, and start counting down.
The asshole customer who told me to Fuck off, my manager to Fuck off, tried to attack my manager, came back to start a fight and throw racial slurs around ended up unconscious, stripped to his underwear left in the planking position under a truck. It was excessive but the asshole really strung some bad decisions together to end up where he did.
I was wasted and was waiting at the bar to order a drink or water or food when one of my friends handed me a warm tequila shot. I took the shot and a few seconds later threw up all of the contents of my stomach (7 or 8 vodka cranberries and Taco Bell) onto the guy in front of me. Thinking on my feet I immediately and angrily turned around to act like someone had puked on me too. Since the guy in front of me thought we were on the same side we both looked for the cocksucker who puked on us for several minutes. Good thing he never asked to see proof.